Life moves on and everything happen for a reason…to give up in the end is far easier than giving up everything to live through it, its a different feeling…
4 practicals, 10 days… And long vacation! When its all done, am becoming what i dreamt of since 2009??? Almost a decade in making a dream come true… Boring higher secondary tutions, a year of preparation behind closed doors, nearly 5years of college… Uff!!! And now, going for the last fight ( atleast inside my head ), it’s a long way, can’t believe, looking back i made through till this day in one piece ( rhetorically ).
So yeah, day after tomorrow my practical starts. Why this post? I thought this is kinda that day, i got why i should not give up on my dream. Not that it took a decade, but it is transforming me… Irresponsible kid to someone more responsible ( oops! I will explain that later ). And i love that part of this phase.
2017, it started out like any other year! Adding one year to my existence in this planet ( pain pf having born in January ), 4months into it, Alas! It been the best, i guess!
Final phase of college, the pain of leaving has never been there ( not because of the intern year ), but the few people i was lucky to be with in this phase of life. From keeping my facial muscles busy, letting me feel at ease, from being a stranger to a wellwisher to eyeopener ( this person deserves more adjectives that these ) . The healthy relations and the new opppurtunities i realised in the last 4months, motivates me!
Becoming what i dreamt of and loving what i become is all that is needed for a happy life…is it? ( Hope i write back one day, saying i was right )!
There can be no happiness if things we believe in are different from the things we do
Lately, I was thinking about my future days to come. I was said, by elders, to keep the spirit live inside by thinking about the beautiful future, what you will become, imagining yourself in that sort of high position, etc these always helped me get up and fight back when i was down. But it is not so now, all those days i dreamt about, the high positions i will become is going to happen in very less time, and am afraid. Now, I get questions up in my head, strange feeling in my gut when i think, so i rarely do so. Instead, I started pushing those questions out from my head, with difficulty, yes, am improving. What this has to do with growing up?
August 16, 2012, it all started that day, when i think and ask myself what i have done or changed in me since that day, i hardly find anything. Four years since joining this college, i doubt what have changed in me! Did i grow up? Or did i just existed here?. Many things happened at different levels, did i go up or down?. One thing i keep telling myself ever since i started introspecting is, ‘I never came here with these thoughts’, is it a sign of change. I believe it is.
Pretty excited about my first post, was wondering how to begin everything here. I’ve been thinking of a suitable topic for a while now, and finally decided to write a series on growing up…
Born in the 90’s, I got the opportunity to have the glimpse of 20th century, though BPL tv, Arial antenna, DD news, Sunday evening movie, Video games, Costly Keypad mobile phones, Vague term internet (then), all that i could remember that fascinated me, well ofcourse in my school days. If it was each year or so, in those times I got to hear something big happening around (ofcourse, into the early 21st a bit, as i grew to someone who understood what is heard), nowadays its like everyday or so, new developments, in every field around me. To grow up in these times is tough, dreams keep on drifting, feelings change like the everyday science, still to grow is the challenge I find more interesting these days.
Enrolled to the medical college in my mid 19, I knew very little on my opportunities, what i wanted from life, or what i should do about it. 4 years into it, Now in the final phase of getting myself up for the ultimate gameplan to crack the final 4 months, am afraid of what awaits, the fear of growing up as some would call it. Questions keep popping up my head, what next?. Medical college changed me, from someone who had wished to become a doctor and do biotechnology research to someone who wish to stay idle, do nothing for rest of the life (ofcourse, that is not possible), or at least travel around, see places! I keep on asking, why? Was medical college that confusing?, was the time here so hectic that i didnot do enough homeworks for my future? or is it just the mere act of growing up?.