Friends · Growing Up · Journal

Break-up?

Story of breaking apart from relations is never ending tale of emotional drama

It took me a little long – like years – to understand the reason for my sadness in breaking apart from relations. Friendship, love, death or whatever! Leaving one is always giving the same feeling – sad, depressed. So, i set on to search for cause!

Yeah!I too had the same thought – ‘why find a cause? Because Its part and parcel of being human, get sad when someone close leave! Ryt?.

Everyone, in oneself is having individual existence, independent of each other! In a relation or not, that never change. If being an individual is important, being sad in break-up is out of equation. Since am not following an equation, i was bound to get sad! Ryt?. Getting sad was a routine, will be a routine forever, i thought on some bad mornings.

Myself being common in my breakups, i decided to find a reason for my sadness, being a strong believer of individuality i should get that reason and neutralize its effect on me becoming independent. After many long solo rides, searching for it, i got glimpse of one good reason, that could explain everything happened in past breakups.

Explaining oneself to others is difficult, and in a short time its a big task. Doing the same to one who wish to move apart is another difficult story all together. That story had been happening the whole time, with most of my breakups. Trying to explain myself, making myself clear to that person, with some part of me wishing for that person to be there with me, making me fight for it, while another wish to back off! Latter would win in the end but with some scars to learn from and move on.

So yeah! What if i wish to take breakups as an abrupt end to any relation?, Then when will i explain myself, the answer will always be, never explain yourself to anyone, remain oneself… Live Happy!

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Friends · Growing Up · Journal

Why I Ride???

So all of a sudden i decided to write this post down tonight, because i want to make clear to myself one good reason, ‘Why I Ride?’.

Having MyBird for going anywhere and everywhere meant, that reason is, for being with Matt rest of life. She have become an integral part of my life in past 7 months. Starting with first long ride to the one i made tonight, the amount of trust i have on her, i never had with any. The moments were cursed about the oncoming bright traffic at night to the roadside breaks, were i laid my back on her, will always be the best. From the kickstart in the morning to the time i put her on centre stand for a long rest at nightfall, all i care for is our happiness.

If that’s not it, then i thought watching NPCB ( malayalam movie) about 5years ago, were the hero rides towards the feeling in his heart on his thumping machine, was that reason which made me ride. As portrayed in the movie riding towards a destination is not why we ride, its about the journey and all that comes with it. Ups and Downs, Feelings and Aches, People and Places enroute the destination is more than many reasons why i ride.

Still, is that it?! the respect towards a machine, who puts the same amount of trust on the rider is i think the best reason i would ride for.

I don’t ride because i don’t have anything else to do, i ride because i love, every second of it and i live to ride, ride where ever MyBird would take me. When we are together, all that we care for is each other, hence we ride as long as we can!

NB:- to whom so ever it may concern, this moment of life is more important to me than last second or next minute. I don’t have a dream life, am living it every second! TICK.TICK.TICK…

Peace!

Growing Up · Journal · Poems

Storm is Coming…

She was there

Like every stranger out there

She never spoke

Not till I made that mistake

She stood by me

Like every friend out there

She stood by me

To enjoy the goodness in me

She was there

Like every friend out there

She cared for me

And thought it was mad to care for me

She was a stronger

And life got better

She was there

Like every girl out there

She wanted nothing

Nothing, but everything

She shed tears every night

For that fight she thought was right

She did everything right

Did nothing to put things right

She stood there

When its time for me to go.

Journal

She and her True love

Like all of us born in 90s she had her first computer ( desktop version ) at her high school and started social networking! Just kidding, in those times, a decade ago, before whatsapp era! Gmail was the identity online and the options to meet new ones online was facebook. Like all, she got her account online, started her virtual social life…

She soon was requested by a boy for friendship online, like all the stories! She accepted him after putting him for jury’s discussion ( her friends! ). Getting to know someone far from you, and talking to them every nonsense we want to talk to is another level of fun! She took full advantage of her belief that she aint gonna meet him ever. While she had just thoughts of being friends, boy went the next stage and proposed her as expected she said ‘No’, she aint for this kind of things, esp when its time to put all these down, quit online life and start working towards board exam coming in a month ( 12th boards ). But it only got continued on phones for the next few months ( oops continued for next few years! ). His friend, who played a important role in making him propose her, soon joined their company of friends. She never liked this friend, she thought he was not of her kind and was not that interested in talking to him. They had good friendship, till one day this friend of friend revealed his heart for her. As usual she said ‘No’. Which later turned to yes, as he opened up his story more to her. And then came the long vacation at the end of school, when we decide on what next in life. Like any, entrance was among options. She had no interest in doing any specific thing! But wanted not to go far from him, and she applied in a college were he also applied for BSc degree. Unfortunately she got in, he didn’t. He got into another college nearby. Oops! Did it end there, Like Happily everafter???

Alas! No. Then came drama! He went abroad to settle in some business, She quit degree course and went on to study for MBBS entrance exam! But why? Yeah, to gain sometime ( from home ) and to stand on her shoes. During her coaching class days, they had kept contact, meeting occassionally here and there! SMSes ( whatsapp was not in the scene )! And few fone calls. When things went off their control they kept silent! Not talking for months.

Adding some twists to the drama, One day her Dad asked about a proposal and she straight away told, she dont want and she is in love. Like any parents, they went on an emotional spree, from which they soon recovered. Her Dad’s first encounter with him, through a call saying, they won’t marry her to him soon, to which he replied would wait for her till she is ready, was truly in the clouds, Baap tho flat ho gayi uspe!. May be after that, it happened to be like any other story! Marriage! And happily ever after.

Note:- i couldnt do justice for the story as it can’t be expressed in this post alone. I wrote to remember this person And for this couple, so lovely!

Growing Up · Journal

What is this world?

#TaggedPuppets

“Independence, learned to be independent” a friend replied, when i asked on last year resolutions.

I too had lot of things to be done this year. Most of them checked! Few unchecked/half checked things still left. One out of which is ofcourse, being Independent.

But I dont know how! Dependence to a 4 to 6 inch screen, which can open whole world at finger tips, is taken as a factor in removing dependence to humans.

Why Mobile phones? – I would say, it provides a ‘controlled environment’ to talk to anyone, without being infront of them. Controlled – because the hang up key is there on your side as well.

Why messages? – Make life better, ryt? Waiting till someone start typing Or for light to turn colour all familiar feeling altogether – Independence, My Friend said. Away from all real form of humans!

PS: Independence is a feeling, you get when you do what you needed the most, that too with passion – Do what you Love and Love what you do

Journal · Travel Diaries

Ride to The Capital of Cholas Via The Foothills of Chamundi ( Part one )

“when life is so monotonous,

give it a thump of enfield”

Before all of it began…

The day before thiruvonam, on 3rd September 2017 I was called back to college to attend ward on 4th. everyone was home for Onam, at first felt sad, but later decided I have to go. Next day morning i found myself driving back to college early with some mixed feelings on me being called up to attend ward. The 90km drive filled me with lot of thoughts! most of it were on getting out of ward and going somewhere, Threeforth way to college I came to know, i was not needed to attend ward that day, someone else was going to replace me! later turned out to be my saviour for the day. Anyway i reached college, found the one who was to replace me for the day, and my work ended by around 10 am!. By that time, i had a thought building up over my head, A SOLO RIDE! Different from the solo trips done this year, here i go with Me, a backpack and My Thunderbird.

But where to go… as always, my trips were always to places where i had friends, family or i had some thing to do there. This plan too ended up in such place! Thanjavur, Tamil Nadu. Thanjavur was an easy pick, what turned out to be hard was the route! i had to go thanjavur via different route than 450kms straight through my home!. i tackled that by adding a stop at Mysore, which made journey, one way 650km…One decision that made a whole lot of impact on my travel plans to come after this trip was over!!!

First leg of journey

Here i go… she roared to life at 11:45am and my journey started from college!. Something brought a smile on my face as i rode through, the excitement of making that first ride or the sense of freedom two wheels gave me.

Rules I had put first was no stops unnecessarily, but stop every 50kms! And take long breaks every 100kms. Calculated correctly my first stop happened after 50kms at wayanad chwaram view point

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Heavenly First stop and this beautiful view of the bents and the beautiful valley, clouds and hills all filled me with intense excitement. There were lot of people i managed to get some good shots. Stood there feeling the wind. and returned for the rest of the journey up the twists and turns towards the top.

When riding alone, one has the freedom to change destinations while on the ride! one such impulse came at this moment…

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That’s when i told myself, this was not an adventure trip ( which later turned out to be one ), rather a journey to meet my friend at mysore and brother in law at thanjavur.

Apart from the last few kilometres to 100, the road was good till i reached mananthavady ( Plan was to avoid Bandipur National park) where i took my long break on the roadside… Just after Kattikulam – Begur Reserve Forest! They had some beautiful roads, but watch out for the humps/rumble strips, meant for animal crossings, Alas! there was so many of them ( I hated those so much). I had stopped for few snaps, like…

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as this short stretch of forest reserve finished my second step of journey started…

Second step of journey

Journey so far was more than good, loved each part of it. Then, i was to enter one major forest range! though i had avoided the Bandipur national park, the part i was going to cover is along the border of the same and nearby Nagarhole national park. At first the roads looked little familiar ( i had been to mysore three times ), but as it turned out to be the same road we had went down during the first year tour to mysore. The roads were super good. The twists and turns, Greenery all around, and all i could hear is my engine’s thump!…

Though it was forest zone! i couldnt resist from getting down for some shots like…

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and after a rest like for 5 mins, restarted the journey. Finished up rest of the park in next 1 hour or so to end up at the karnataka side of the park. Rajiv Gandhi National Park that’s what they called this side of the reserve. I stopped as i saw a tap roadside, to have some water, near the entrance to park on the karnataka side. A local helped me have some water at the tap ( as it was one of the pumping type of tap )

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Was able to get a few shots of kabani reservoir too. I enjoyed the view on the ride further as i stood up on my footrest! Coolest thing to do when i ride the bird..

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Once i crossed the park, then it was about 60km to Mysore! Straight clean Roads with scenic beauty on both sides, only thing to be cared for are the cattles, in plenty crossing roads with no fear.

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sun rays escaping, producing this effect as my sister called ‘Akashavani’ has been my partner on every travel after this!

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This Photo happened as a failed attempt to capture my shadow perfectly aligned with the bullet head. After that stretch of road, i reached my friend’s college around 5pm! ( as usual it was a surprise visit ). After some chit chat there, we went out in search of food ( as i have left at odd time, couldn’t fill my stomach well ). Got a good restaurant, at 6-6:30 pm we were the first customers for dinner that night. Guha Restaurant it was! good ambience ( except it was so dark ), it looked like this!

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Leaving that restaurant around 7:30pm, confused whether to halt here or go down 500plus kms to thanjavur! We decided to climb up the hill to top of chamundi to see the night view of Mysore!

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Incredible it ended up to be. On the way back, freezing cold it was, so we decided to have a cup of coffee near the college, we had arranged inbetween somewhere to stay for the night! But eventually i decided to depart. As i said in the beginning, Decision that changed my entire riding, since this one!

Final Run of the Day

As i said to my friend when i left from Mysore, ‘i had decided my trip when i started, i dont want to stop it now’. and i started on the 500plus km through some roads google aunty fed on to my ear… To be continued!!!

Journal

Regrouping thoughts

So, It happened to be one of those days where I end up thinking about myself, trying to get myself together. It all happened when I had brought out things that was suppose to be a secret, the conversation carried on to some years and climbed up, that one commented, indirectly how intolerable I were in real. From breaking trust, hurting someone to ending up knowing how things are in real world out there.

It was easy to escape saying its all subjective getting hurt, and it has got nothing to do with me, on whatever I say… But where is my tongue ties? what is all about these loose talks?. Its not that, I should be shutting my mouth starting at this moment, learning to draw line between words that feel good and those that makes people feel bad is what I should be trying.

Its not important for anyone to tolerate me, but people should not just blindly comment am intolerable. Whatever made them say it, got to have a reason, which I have to deal as an immediate priority…